Find out what limiting beliefs are and what impacts they can have on the lives of children and adolescents.
We succeed in overcoming challenges when we believe we can do this. Similarly, we cannot overcome them when we believe that this is impossible. Limiting beliefs are obstacles that prevent us from changing the world. But they can be avoided and dealt with early in children’s lives.
The family plays an essential role in this incentive, since children see in their relatives the first figures of trust and authority. Knowing that everything we tell you about your behavior can be absorbed as truth, it is worth understanding how to avoid limiting your parenting beliefs.
What are limiting beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are justifications, most often without justification, that people may carry throughout their lives without realizing it, but that profoundly affect the way they deal with other people, unpredictability, arguments, and challenges.
They are “beliefs” because they are explanations that do not find bases in real life, yet they still affect us. As much as a person deconstructs a limiting belief, that is, understands its irrational nature, it can still be an obstacle in daily life.
This is because our affective background creates mental models that determine our attitudes. These mental models may require more than a rational explanation to resignify itself.
Limiting beliefs are built into our minds from imposing phrases and are generally accompanied by negative words, such as “I am not as good as they think I am”, “life is very difficult” and “never will be.” Succeed”.
Here are some limiting beliefs:
- Bad experiences
“I’m not going because I don’t feel comfortable.” Most of the time, limiting beliefs arise due to a set of factors that make an experience unpleasant, therefore difficult to face again.
- Wrong justifications
Limiting beliefs take shape in numerous justifications for not facing certain situations. Often these justifications come from outside, when other people make a point to announce them.
Imposition of aesthetic standards.
Questioning the physical appearance is normal, since we can be dissatisfied with a series of personal characteristics. However, this becomes unhealthy when we denigrate our own weight, skin, hair texture, or other body characteristics, especially when we use it as justification for not having certain attitudes.
- Fear of consequences.
“They won’t like me,” “it has to be perfect,” “it’s not good enough.” The limiting belief can highlight fear of what others think of you or the result of your actions.
- There is no time for change.
“It is too late”, “I am too old to do this”, “I don’t have time”. The limiting belief is a defense mechanism that keeps the person in the comfort zone.
What are the impacts on children’s lives?
Helping children educate their emotions is not an easy task. It is a long process and takes literally a lifetime. But this effort bears fruit early! Children who realize the importance of talking about feelings and sharing experiences have a lower risk of developing limiting beliefs. Children see family judgments as truths more easily, so an incorrect comment can feed inaccurate notions they have about their own behaviors and appearances.
How to avoid limiting beliefs in parenting?
- Helps identify feelings
It is common for children not to know very well how to name what they feel, especially in the midst of an explosion of feelings. Helping them do this is a healthy way for the family to act, as it helps identify the roots of the discomfort.
- Show willingness to find a way out
Be willing to solve the child’s emotional problems. This is great for building a strong parent-child relationship.
A good way to rethink a bad experience and avoid developing a limiting belief is to go through the same situation in a different way, that is, allow the person to see, in practice, that things are not so painful and that there is always a problem. problem solution. .
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